Homework Week 5 – Complex Sentences

We have looked at writing complex sentences,which are very powerful and creative.
An example is from Margaret Wild’s story called ‘The Fox.’

…In the evening, when the air is creamy with blossom, dog and magpie relax at the mouth of the cave, enjoying each other’s company.

My example, using the the same sentence structure, was from a personal experience I had on the weekend.

…During the afternoon, when the sun was brightly shining down, we kayaked around the huge deserted lake, paddling effortlessly through the calm and glistening water.

Can you please post your examples of complex sentences as a comment and remember your next challenge is to start using these types of sentences in your own writing. This will be due by this Thursday (16-5-2013). You are able to post more than one sentence too.

60 thoughts on “Homework Week 5 – Complex Sentences

  1. In the evening, when the sun was orange and the sky was smokey, we charged at our trampoline in our backyard, trying effortlessly to reach the top of the massive trampoline.

    1. Wow Reece, that sentence was vey complex, you used nice emotive words while using powerful synonyms, nothing to improve on here. Joyful job.

      1. Thank you Jay and Guguei I appreciate your comments and it makes me feel absolutely magnificent to get great comments back.

    2. Reece, I think your complex sentence was amazing and you were very descreptive it it and also you had some amazing emotive words in it. Good job!

  2. In the evening, when the bright sun was shining down, I was effortlessly running around the enormous school, running franticly away from the extremely over size vicious dog.

    1. Well done Guguei that is a absolutely epic complex sentences, I think it may be better then my one and i still think it is amazing

    2. Guguei, I think you could of used a better word than “dog” at the end because your sentence is very descreptive until it comes to the word “dog” you could of said, a vicios monster or beast, anyway good job

  3. In the middle of the night, when the neighborhood was silent and the moon lit up the night sky, I was skillfuly beating my brother at table tennis, while effortlessly rapping to the awesome music in the backround!

    1. Great job Zach, I saw great emotive words, maybe a but more, but I think you did an excellent job on the synonyms! superb job.

    2. Magnificent job Zach, you put very disruptive post and I saw a lot of emotive words.
      P.S you did a fantastic job.

  4. In the middle of summer at mid-day, when the streets where as queit as a mice, I franticly beat my sister at doing netball in the shead, while my younger brothers where loudly cheering me and my sister on.

    1. Great job there Chloe, You used the right words to tell the complex sentence, but the words I would like to see would be a bit more emotive words and synonyms. But nice storyline. Fantastic work.

    2. WOW Chloe, great job you described your work, about how you beat your sister doing netball in the shed, and your brothers were cheering on, very emotive and descreptive.

  5. In the morning, when it was horribly ice fog, when the park was empty, I got chased by a giant bulldog, chasing me down the wet path but it was puffing and couldn’t run any more.

    1. Nice job Dakotah, you put in a couple of emotive words and synonyms and emotive words, but it would be better to see more. But extreme job!

    2. Dakotah, i really dont think you re-read your work after posting it, any way it was still very descreptive and ahd some emotive words in it!

  6. In the cold, cloudy and sad morning, when I could see the tip of the glaring sun, I walked effortlessly and happily on my journey to school, enjoying the company of my sister.

    1. I did a great job, but I need to improve putting in way more emotive words and synonyms, but for me I don’t think it’s that bad. Everybody else’s are great as well! Be very proud.

    2. WOW Jay, i think that your complex sentence is very descreptive and has some emotive words in it! Great job!

  7. I was lying down on the greenest grass on a boiling summer’s evening, a gentle wind was blowing softly across my burning cheeks, although the sun was starting to edge down over the grassy green hills, the sun was still blazing down making everything gleam, since it was warm and breezy I couldn’t help but close my hazel eyes, soon I was fast asleep and I dreamt wonderful dreams, and when I woke up I saw a astonishing sight, it was a shooting star, I wished that all the people around the world who don’t have clean water be sponsored by a person and get clean water, for themselves and their family, I also wished for them to have a happy life.

    1. WOW! How did you put in such great detail Logan, no offence everybody else, but seriously, this is the best one I have seen so far! There are a lot of nice synonyms and emotive words in this great and powerful story. It is very detailed as well! Massive fantastically superb job!

    2. Logan, I believe that that is not a complex sentence, you just need to change some things around. You started of with who and the said when, if you tryed you could defently correct your work now that we have learnt more on complex sentences. Still i think you have done a good job wioth many emotive words.

  8. In the morning, when the bright sun rose from its bed, I woke so frantically when mum woke me effortlessly to get ready for school.

    1. Wow Gugeui, this is the third complex sentence I have read! I saw a nice mix of emotive words in this powerful sentence. You deserve a big pat on the back!

    2. Guguei, I think that your complex sentence was amazing, you have all the thhings you need in a complex sentence I enjoyed reading this complex sentence! keep up the good work!

  9. In the morning, me and dad went hunting for deer , then frantically there were two deer in front of us, then they ran so fast that we could not see them any more I could’t believe it.

    1. Very excellent job! I didn’t see very emotive words though, but you still did a great job Cody, you put it in the right order, and it is a fascinating story! Nice job

    2. Very good! i can tell what you and your dads feelings were when tge deer was infront of you and when you were fantically running away from them. You used some emotive words but there could of been more in there! great job anyway!

  10. In the night, the cold, frosty and windy night, I franticly woke up from a ferocious scream, I look out in small, frosty window and it was a bird loudly chirping.

    1. Guguei, i think that you defently didn’t re-read over ypur word and you can tell you didnt write it in word. Fantatic job anyway!

  11. In the afternoon, when the bright hot sun shined over us, we were play a game that everyone got extremely puff when it was suppose to be a game that people should be franticly running around, the hot bright sun got covered by rain cloud and everyone was jumping for joy because they don’t have to run in the blazing sun.

    1. I really love how you put your time and effort in to put in two complex sentences. This one for sure was very detailed, I love it! I don’t really think that there is anything else to improve on! Superb.

    2. guguei, i think your complex sentences has imropved from the other two you did because this one has more emotive words and is very detailed, im guessing if someone was to read your peice of writing then they would think the same about the emotive words. Good job!

  12. In the morning, the frosty cold morning, we did are horrifying running in the cold morning, we ran around the school everyone was running so franticly behind me and I finished effortlessly with superb time of 3.15min, at the end everyone felt good because they felt worm after running the distends.

    1. Massive great job Guguei, I really loved this piece of work, it is very detailed but you mentioned morning a lot. But other than that, nothing else to improve! Well done!

    2. good job Guguei, your punctuation was not as good as the rest o your work but anyway its amzing with some emotive words and some descreptive words the tell the reader what your writing about. Well done!

  13. In the morning, when a cold wind blows, I curled up in a warm, fuzzy, huge and soft blanket trying to get really warm and cosy.

    1. Well done Nyetap, I see that you have put in a huge amount of emotive words. I loved how you used the word “curled” because it shines everything up.

    2. Well done Nyetap, I can easly see that you must be very cold and very descreptive, its very good and you used some good emotive words, also words that tell the reader what is happening and how you feel.

  14. In the morning it was wet damp and wet, I ran franticly so I could get my best time this year, I was panicing if I did’nt get under 8 mins. I got the half of 8 wich was 4.

    1. Great job Brittany, one huge thing though, was that there was a lot of spelling errors, but it still made sense, and it was very fantastic Brittany. Well done.

    2. Good job Brittney, Its ver descreptive and has many emotive words in it, the good thing is it makes sense, and its awesome. Excellent.

  15. In the dark foggy morning we ran out side to see what the loud banging nosie was we looked every where we looked in the dog pen and there is our dog jumping up to try to get out of his massive pen

    1. Super job Loki, you put some fantastic emotive words and you made it sound like it is scary and I think lots of other people would agree with me and that is why I think you did a absolutely super job.

    2. Good job Loki, you put some emotive words in it, but it was very descreptive you made it sound really important and scary. Fantastic

  16. In the dark foggy night, I ran inside from the huge flood behind me, I went inside and stayed there,running up and down the house, while crying with laughter.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s