Snapshot

Use at least one of these pictures to come up with a snapshot piece of writing. Use powerful language and interesting sentences. Think about using a complex sentence like we used this morning. Think about what you see, hear, smell, feel and taste. Revise your work before posting

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16 thoughts on “Snapshot

  1. 1st picture: Very Grey. ;(
    I can see thousands of dark, grey clouds and a light grey sky. I can see a big string of wind so visible fading up into the dark clouds. I can see rubbish and bits of the environment around me blowing crazy in the wind getting dragged to another place. I can see waves in the ocean wildly crashing about on one another like 2 children fighting for candy.
    I can feel the rubbish and sticks thrashing in my face in horror. I can feel the wind pushing me to different directions strongly. I can feel my hair blowing in the wind and slamming on my face hardly so it hurts.
    I can hear the wind so loudly making me so i’m deaf. I can hear people bickering whispering and screaming in their houses and exaggerate.
    I can smell the ghastly smoky wind swirling around and around in the distance. I can smell the salty salt uprising from the ocean leading into my nostrils. I can also taste them horribly in my mouth that my taste buds cant take for too much longer. 🙂 😉 🙂 😉 😀

    1. Heidie, that is an excellent comment, you have heaps of information, great description, you have lots of emotive words and descriptive words. 20 out of 10. Great job.

  2. Screams are hardly heard over the terror of the wind. There are buildings devastatingly being destructed. The long twirl of wind is roaming around the beach and the city. The massive destructive wind is smashing the windows. People are terrified and stunned as the tornado is moving around and destroying everything in its own path. People are panicking because they have no idea what to do. People are shocked because their house may’ve been destroyed and they might have had something special. My mouth is filled with the fear of others. I’m sensing the taste of the tornado. My nose is filling in with the smell of the devastating destruction. The massively strong wind is so strong, that it is hurting my nose when it goes by me. I strongly smell the fear of other people’s emotions. The massive tornado is roaring through my little ears. The huge sound of everybody else’s scream is streaming through me. All of the buildings are smashing together making a crumble of mess.

    1. Great work Jay. This is a good snapshot as you have used some great description. Next time you may try and work on using different words in your work by using synonyms. In this piece of writing you used words such as massive and people more than once.

    2. Great snapshot Jay, just outstanding, you have used great description, but some of the time you used the same words, like Mr Andrew said you may improve your work by using synonyms. ( Not trying to copy you Mr Andrew.) Superb work Jay.

  3. The buzzing flies are annoying me and I don’t help when the sea gulls smell disgusting, even in the fresh air. I find the revolting sea water awful. Waves crash down while surfer are surfing and there people swimming. I’m glad I live near this beautiful beach not far from the busy city. The wind is roaring as loud as a tiger roaring at its prey. The rusting sand is soft between my toes. A flock of birds fly past and make a very strong gasp of wind.

  4. Two scared people are dangerously stuck in the clear blue water. The sharks are bravely circling around them, hungry as they sense food. The two men are trying to swim away from the fear while the terrifying sharks get closer. Their shiny bright teeth are getting nearer, the jaws of the sharks are about to open!

  5. The roar of the water crashing is deafening, as my boat plunges into the abyss. I think that I may die but hope I will survive. The salt water burns my nose and mouth, as the sharp rocks and swirling water send me spinning.

  6. 2nd Picture: Is that……?
    I can feel the water rushing quickly under my canoe making it hard for me to paddle away from the definite waterfall up in the mountain. As I go over the edge butterflies invade my stomach and I feel nervous. I feel unsafe as I have no protection except for thin pants and a thick coat with 2 socks. The horrifying height I am fighting against is way past my expectation for survival. I am extremely stunned from what I am facing now, as I did not expect my lovely canoe to be wiggling around in a brightly orange canoe. The rocky walls around me makes my tummy feel anxious and cautious. My eyes start to water as the front of the canoe leans forward. I feel like my body is getting de structured. The water crashing against the rocks is making my nerves grow humongous and I feel as if I am in a horror movie that dies. I don’t want this. I can smell blood from my imagination and try not to think about it. I can feel my bum bumping up and down from the currents strongly pushing me to the edge of the horrific waterfall.

  7. A roaring sound like a pack of lions roaring as loud as they can is all you could hear. The looks on people’s faces are worried, scared and unsafe because they don’t know where the tornado is going to move to next. All you can taste is wind gushing into your mouth. All you’ll concentrate on is a whirlpool but it’s made of wind instead of water. You can only smell the fields and wind going into your nose. Buildings and houses are being ripped apart, and windows are being smashed from the tornado. Peoples are being taken away from their loved ones.

  8. Snapshot on the waterfall picture
    A kayak is being pulled over the edge of the waterfall by the strong currents it is emitting. A jet of water is constantly falling down into a pool of dirty mucky water. A person is screaming as he is pulled over by the strong frothy waterfall. Big humongous jagged vicious snowy rocks just waiting to tare and crush the small kayak against its rocky sharp edges as the kayak is easily tipped over the side of the waterfall. I hear the person screaming as he is maybe plummeting towards his frightful doom. The scream is deafening as he is dragged over by the ruthless waterfall. The scream is piercing my ears like millions of tiny razor sharp daggers. I am terrified, the breath suddenly left my lungs as he is pulled effortlessly over the raging rapid waterfall wondering if he will alive, severely injured or dead. I am bewildered and shocked. I am extremely anxious to hear if he is okay. I am anxious to ensure his safety. The fear is uncontrollably oozing out of him, all that fear coming out of him make me petrified as he plummets towards the frothy ruthless white foaming pool beneath him.

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