THERE’S a bunfight on in Cavendish, a beef so big you can’t get your head around it.

For three years, the one local shop has been daring all comers to open their big mouths.

And every person who tried has walked out beaten.

They have bitten off more than they, or anyone else, can chew.

In 2006 the Cavendish Cafe at the general store wanted a gimmick, something that would stop traffic.

They came up with Australia’s biggest hamburger, a 4kg meaty megalith that does stop traffic and could probably stop a motorbike cold if you sat it on the road.

Owners Roz and Rodney Duffin issued a challenge that anyone who could eat it in an hour would get their $38.90 back. Nobody has come remotely close.

“It’s just a hamburger with the lot,” Roz says, but that’s like calling the Sahara a sandpit. The burger is Australia’s biggest, the cafe’s standard one-with-the-lot alarmingly upsized.

Blokes full of bravado drive the three hours west from Melbourne. Blokes full of beef and bacon drive home, stuffed, with half a burger in a doggie bag.

Tourists change their itineraries to tackle it.

Its fame has reached as far as Germany.

“The whole burger weighs four kilos and the meat pattie itself weighs a kilo and a half, which is the equivalent of 17 of our regular patties,” Mrs Duffin says.

“The buns are specially made in Warrnambool. They are spectacular.”

Nutritionist Matt O’Neill from Metabolic Jumpstart said Australia’s biggest burger was the equivalent of three days worth of energy for the average person – almost 23,000 kilojoules.

The cafe’s sign promises “Fast Food” but the big burger is anything but.

Cooking a pattie that big is a cow of a job. It takes 20 minutes, and a pizza shovel to flip it.

Eating one is a bigger production. A construction crew from Melbourne split one 10 ways for smoko yesterday, and still didn’t get it down.

“You need overalls to eat it,” one bloke warned.

Kane Parish, 19, a builder from Horsham, sank his teeth into one around lunchtime.

“Not a chance,” he said, surrendering after a quarter.

Nobody has ever got far past half.

“I don’t think we’ve ever brought one out where people haven’t said ‘Oh My God!’,” Mrs Duffin says.

“I’ve seen grown men look like they’re going to cry when they couldn’t finish it.

“I’ve had a couple that were just so disappointed. His mate just sat there eating a normal hamburger with the lot, laughing at him.

“He was so disappointed. He took it personally.”

The burger is lovingly made, tasty, not greasy, and some locals buy one to take home and feed the family.

– Describe why a restaurant would make a burger so big.

– Explain why people would try and eat this burger.

– Choose one of the following situations and complete a snapshot piece of writing.

  • You see the burger for the first time as a waiter brings it towards you. What are you thinking, seeing, smelling, hearing and feeling? Be descriptive.
  • You are more than half way through the burger and starting to feel extremely full. What are you thinking, seeing, smelling, hearing and feeling? Be descriptive.